The following is pitch that I wrote for the Huffington Post and an audience of the general public. They’ve yet to publish it, so what the heck! I own a blog, so here it is. Forgive me for straying away from dance/fire/flow arts in this topic, but I’ve warned you – I like to write. About everything, including muggle issues. 😉 The (Im)Balance of Being a Wife, Mother, and Employee I forgot to pick up my kids from school today. It wasn’t the first, and it might not be the last time. While you might want to hashtag this “worstmomever,” allow me to defend my (non) action.
When your routine changes, it can be easy to let a little thing slip through the cracks—you might forget to drop off a piece of mail, for example. But this week, I realized that we don’t have a normal routine, ever, and somehow I had made it through my kids getting into fourth and fifth grade thinking that we did. Our “normal” weeks were so rare that when they did occur, I’d find myself looking to stir things up. Perhaps, though, that’s how I managed to write a novel this year. Maybe it’s why we chose to buy our dream home, complete with a one-acre vineyard to maintain and manage.
I read recently about a triangle that exists if you’re a wife, a mother, and employee, and how it’s said that of these, one corner is always suffering. This struck a chord with me, as I’ve always been proud of the way I successfully keep all three running smoothly. I work for a progressive, creative company where I write about art and creativity, I get my boys to soccer practices and games and karate classes, and on some weekends, we make it to church. And, I have great sex with my amazing husband (sorry if this embarrasses anyone).
But, I forgot to pick up my kids from school today.
I found out when I was working from home, on a phone conference with about 17 people across the country (on a day off, technically, fwiw). My husband called my cell twice, then our landline, the my cell again, as I tried to ignore it and pay attention to my colleagues (husband corner, minus one point). Finally, I put my cell on mute and called my husband from the landline, holding both phones to my ears. He answered his phone with, “Did you get the boys?” “Nope,” I said and I hung up the landline, grabbed my keys, and accidentally hung up on my colleagues with my cheek (work corner, minus one point). Once I had my boys at home, we ate quick snacks and started on homework until it was time to leave for karate class.
Starting out the driveway, I was proud that we’d be on time that night—maybe even early, if the traffic light gods were on my side. But then I checked my gas gauge. It hadn’t been that close to empty since I was in college, living on coffee and tacos. Mercifully, we made it to a gas station, and were late to karate (kids corner, minus one point).
So what I’ve realized is that maybe if all parts of my life “suffer” equally, that’s okay, because everything is at least balanced, right? After all, there’s no way I’m giving up on an awesome career, a phenomenal husband, and, mostly, our boys. #liveyourbestlife
Peace, love, and fire,